Your Biggest Enemy? The story you tell yourself
Rewriting your inner narrative
"An unknown but certainly significant proportion of the population has almost completely given up on learning. These people seldom, if ever engage in deliberate learning and see themselves as neither competent at it nor likely to enjoy it. The social and personal cost is enormous.
Although negative self-images can be overcome, in the life of an individual they are extremely robust and powerfully self-reinforcing. Deficiency becomes identity: "I can't learn French, I don't have an ear for languages;" "I could never be a businessman, I don't have a head for figures;"...
If people believe firmly enough that they cannot do math, they will usually succeed in preventing themselves from doing whatever they recognize as math. The consequences of such self-sabotage is personal failure, and each failure reinforces the original belief. And such beliefs may be most insidious when held not only by individuals, but by our entire culture." Seymour Papert - Mindstorms . Quote added in 1 - 2 - 3 James Clear
As I was reading this, a moment came into my mind on how damaging can our self-perception be.
When I was little, I was convinced that I was incapable at math. I stayed away from everything that had to do with it. Looking back, I realized how many learning and career possibilities I blocked out because of my strong self-belief. I was certain that I needed tutoring because of my incompetence. Many years later, my mom told me that tutoring wasn’t a result of my incompetence at all. I know I’m not Einstein when it comes to math, but I clearly made a huge assumption about myself and crafted a powerful story around that negative self-believe—turning it into my sole truth.
The negative reinforcement of ourselves breeds self-sabotage. Consciously or unconsciously, you push opportunities away to avoid dealing with reality. Without notice, self-sabotage can snowball. It leads to procrastination, often out of fear, but even of success. Our behavior confirms our negative self-believe. And there it goes, a cycle that repeats itself.
It feels like a battle between an angel and a devil. Two voices are constantly clashing in your mind. The angel represents the part of you that believes in your potential. It whispers you to break free from limiting beliefs.
On the other hand, the devil is the voice of doubt and fear. It tells you that you're not good enough. Every past mistake is reinforced, twisting reality into 'proof' of your incompetence. The devil thrives on self-sabotage. He feeds on your procrastination and avoidance of challenges. Your comfort zone makes him stronger.
That is the duality that one carries. The key is realizing that you are in control. You get to decide which voice you listen to. Don’t feed the devil. You can’t silence it completely. But self-belief doesn’t rely on cutting off doubt and fear entirely. It’s about choosing not to let it dictate your actions. Search for patterns in your life and search for the root cause.
The most important takeaway? Do not limit yourself. Your mind is far more capable than you give it credit for. If you believe something is impossible, then it will be. But if you challenge that belief, you open doors to possibilities you never imagined.
Very very true! Then there's being in an environment that's conducive to learning. For example, if as a child, you have the most wonderful maths teacher, who makes learning fun, you're more likely to engage with the subject regardless of your natural aptitude.